If people have to self-quarantine, theyll probably spend a lot of time watching TV to make the hours pass. We thought you might like a list of movies about hideous germs and desperate races to find a cure.
Weve excluded zombie movies, because zombies are ridiculous. Granted, zombie movies do a good job of depicting rapid infection and collapse, but anyone whos had the flu knows the last thing you feel like doing is running around and biting people.
THE SATAN BUG (1965)
The bug: Extra-strength botulism.
The plot: Someone steals a biological weapon that could wipe out all life on Earth in a few months. This must be stopped.
Scary part: The premise.
THE OMEGA MAN (1971)
The bug: Something cooked up by the Commies makes you clutch your throat and fall over on the spot.
The plot: Its almost a zombie movie, and when it was remade in 2000 as I Am Legend with Will Smith, it was a zombie movie. Based on a novel by Richard Matheson, its set in the aftermath of a biological weapon attack on the United States. Everyone died except for Charlton Heston, some hippies and a few mutated losers who form an anti-technology cult.
Because it was made in the early 70s, its depressing. Spoiler alert: Heston gives his all to save the world, then dies in a fountain in a posture cribbed directly from Renaissance crucifixion paintings. Its a bit on the nose, as they say, but because Heston had already played Moses, it wasnt much of a stretch.
Scary part: Lots of creepy moments. The onset of the disease is brisk but harrowing. The empty world is eerie, the plague survivors implacable.
THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN (1971)
The bug: A microscopic speck of silicon-based green goop that kills instantly by making all your blood clot.
The plot: Based on Michael Crichtons first techno-thriller, it concerns a satellite that crashes in a tiny New Mexico town. Of course, the locals open it up, and minutes later everyones buzzard feed.
The team assembled to fight includes the calm, logical scientist; the young, handsome doctor angry at the system: the curmudgeon whos too old for this, and the sarcastic, disillusioned but brilliant researcher with a dangerous secret. These all are cliches, of course but they werent cliches in 1971. In fact, it almost plays like a documentary.
Scary part: Directed by Robert Wise (yes, the same guy who made The Sound of Music), the entire movie thrums with dread and spiky, twitchy fear, in part thanks to the use of Gil Milles eerie electronic score. The discovery of the bug remains one of the great unnerving moments of sci-fi youre terrified not so much by the green Jell-O (the props were cliches, too), but what it does. The worst moment might be a test on the effect of the germ on a lab monkey. The viewer had no doubt that theyd just seen a creature die. Right there. On the screen, with pitiless clinical observation. No germ movie has ever felt as real as that moment.
(P.S. The monkey didnt really die.)
OUTBREAK (1995)
The bug: Its called Motaba, but its your basic Ebola.
The plot: Viral hemorrhagic fever was all the rage in the mid-90s, thanks to a book called The Hot Zone, an account of Ebola that terrified readers in 1994. In this fictional version, some idiot smuggles an African monkey into America, producing an outbreak in a picturesque town whose population is drawn from L.L. Bean catalogs. Dr. Dustin Hoffman has to work with his ex-wife, Dr. Rene Russo, to stop evil Gen. Donald Sutherland from using the germ as a weapon.
Its more of an action movie than a plague-thriller, although at the time it seemed impressively high-tech. Now you look at the super-secret labs and wonder why the beakers of Ebola have aluminum foil for stoppers, and why the security system at an infectious disease lab requires everyone to touch a fingerprint reader for access.
Scary part: Its no fun to see Kevin Spacey bleed out of every orifice and convulse.
FLU (2013)
The bug: Take a guess.
The plot: Its a South Korean movie about a lethal airborne virus in a large suburb within sneezing distance of Seoul. From the earnest upright emergency-response guy to the spunky gal scientist to the adorable child in peril, its almost as cliched as The Andromeda Strain.
Just as American pandemic movies usually end up blaming the government, so does this. And just like American movies, this one blames the Yanks, too.
Scary part: The mean soldiers are going to shoot the little girl whos escaping the quarantine.
CONTAGION (2011)
The bug: The MEV-1, which could have been called the lickety-split death bug.
The plot: With many parallels to the coronavirus scare, this is the movie people are renting, its newfound popularity spread how apt by word-of-mouth. Directed by Steven Soderbergh, it lacks the Hollywood polish of Outbreak, the melodrama of Flu and the Cold-War paranoia of The Omega Man. But it has shout-outs to Minneapolis the infected guy on the bus is at Lake and Lyndale! but the Minnesota Department of Health comes off as a bunch of suet-faced idiots who need things like epidemics and germs explained slowly, with pictures.
Its slow-burning, disconnected, abrupt and full of dialogue that throws around medical jargon with no expectation that well know what anyone is talking about. It sketches societal collapse with deft, brisk moments. In short, it just keeps getting worse.
Scary part: They close down the Mondale Elementary School!
COLD STORAGE (?)
This movie, which is listed as being in production a term that covers everything from filming will start tomorrow to a producer is thinking about reading it is based on the book of the same name by David Koepp, best known as the screenwriter of Jurassic Park. Its about a fabulously lethal fungus that makes people climb trees and explode. Where did it come from? A piece of the Skylab space station that fell into a small town in the desert.
Sounds a lot like Andromeda, eh? As the saying goes, everything old is flu again.
Gallery
George Maharis in The Satan Bug, a film from 1965. (The Mirisch Corp.)
Excerpt from:
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Reviewed and Recommended by Erik Baquero